explosivecombat | 018. [Text, and one other thing.]

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018. [Text, and one other thing.]

[TEXT]

Due to various circumstances in my world of origin, for quite a while, time was immeasurable for me. It came to lack meaning. Weeks bled into months, months into years. In some ways, this world seems like that for many of us; there's a lack of structure, and the list of things that one can do with themselves before they settle into some sort of day-to-day routine is incredibly short. These creatures become a part of our daily lives; this world becomes a part of our daily lives. And before we know it, we've spent weeks here. Months. Years.

That blank spot in my life lasted for seven years, I believe. Yet with nothing else to focus on, I discovered more about myself in those seven years than I did over the course of most of the rest of my life. Spending that long in the dark - whether it's physical or otherwise - tends to teach one a lot, I believe, even if it's just where your limits lie.

You'll have to forgive me for the needless introspection; if you're humoring me by continuing to read, either you have more patience than most at half-midnight, or this is one of those messages on the feed that greets you first thing in the morning. But apparently time does have meaning to most people in this place - in which case...

Tell me how long you've been here, if you choose, and what you've come to discover about yourself in that time.

I suppose it's worth saying that personally, I've been here for a year, as of half an hour ago.

For me, it's been another year where time has next to no meaning, despite the fact that I have an easy way to keep track of it; another year with no direction, though I wouldn't say it's been spent in the dark. Whether I like what I've discovered about myself or not within that year has yet to be seen; however, I find myself content with the way things are.

While I know that I have no choice in the matter, I think I could tolerate another year.

[PRIVATE TEXT TO KATO]

I have a favor to ask of you.

Threaded | Flat

I'm all ears, sir. Feel free to visit me in my lab, or I can come to you, should you desire it.

[[Personal favours for the seniors are always okay, after all~]]

[It was almost tl;dr for Rin, but he did zero in on the actual prompt once he skimmed it a few times. Hadn't he already resolved to be more open? It wasn't as if what he was mattered in a place like this, so he shouldn't be so hesitant.

Okay so yes he was going to use this as an excuse to talk to someone new, big deal. Not like he wants to improve himself or anything.]

I'd have been here for eight months, counting next week. ...I don't think I've learned anything new. I feel more like I've stayed the same.

[...talking to this person is always been a bit of a minefield, but he's brought up something that's been getting to Kayneth recently anyway, so... perhaps it will be worth it?]

While I haven't noticed any appreciable differences in my own state of mind, I have to confess that I've also found it fairly easy to lose track of how much time I've been spending here. The realization that I will have been here exactly half a year in exactly one week caught me by surprise the other day, and I'm not quite sure how I feel about it.

[You'll have to forgive him, but Crow simply cannot be bothered to type all of his ~~feels~~ thoughts on the subject, and it's one of those WHO THE HELL NEEDS SLEEP ANYWAY nights, so instead, you'll have a video! In which the duelist actually looks quite thoughtful, holy shit.]

Two years and three months, give or take. As for what I've discovered...

... My own powerlessness.

[Wow okay no that sounded overly deep and serious LET HIM TRY TO FIX THAT.]

I mean-- back home, there were things I could do to protect people I care for, prevent bad shit from happening and stuff... not always, obviously, but still. And I guess I never really realized it could be different? 'S just how things are over there.

Here I... can't stop Team Rocket from attacking people if I ain't nearby. And there's no way in hell I could prevent anyone from leaving, no matter how much I don't want 'em to go. Kinda feels like I can't do much in general...

[TL;DR it's hard when you can't solve all your life problems by playing a card game and no one understands.

Crow makes a short pause and then gives the camera a bright smile.]

Doesn't mean it's gonna keep me from trying! I'd never get anywhere with that sorta attitude, huh?

[And with that, have a wink.]

Congrats on the anniversary, by the way!

SEVEN YEARS?

I arrived here about a good month or two before your arrival. I kept my profile low, however, and only revealed myself on the network after coming into contact with an ally. Speaking of which, I believe it's time we had a talk. [ Those words never mean something good.

Until today. ]

[Ugh, text is difficult and no one understands...]

I have been here for almost three months. It doesn't seem very long in comparison to the year that you've been here, but I have learned a few things about myself.

[...those being the ones you've pointed out to him, but that's not important!]

This world is entirely different from my own. I'm not in a position of power here, nor do I have any sort of control. I'm still not used to it.

What happened during that blank period of your life?

[This guy sounds like he's had a rough deal, but - no, she's not going to ask about that. It's not her business, is it? And besides, she doesn't think it's why he put this message up, anyway; it sounds like he wants to talk about other people more than he wants to talk about himself]

I've been here for about... three months, I think? And as for learning, well, I guess I learned that I can rough it if I really need to. I mean, if someone came up to me four months ago and told me that I'd be sleeping in the woods and backpacking from town to town, I would've thought they were nuts.

Threaded | Flat

[PRIVATE TEXT]

[audio]

[text]

[video]

no subject

text; private

[TEXT]

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