Solf J Kimblee (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
explosivecombat) wrote2014-05-13 09:23 am
explosivecombat) wrote2014-05-13 09:23 am
Entry tags:
- !ic,
- *text,
- @blu sniper,
- @carmen sandiego (here she is),
- @envy,
- @frank archer's utter lack of subtlety,
- @greed's poor life choices,
- @jimmy two-shoes,
- @walter,
- admittedly kind of asking for it,
- but is everyone mad about genocide,
- god is dead and my tl;dr has killed him,
- good ideas are clearly relative concepts,
- hell are you even,
- i used to be hardcore,
- just thought he'd ask,
- like a brick to the face,
- look at your life; look at your choices,
- my social skills are flawless,
- professor of fauxlosophy,
- slacking off like hell,
- texting into the void,
- this is really stupid,
- why we can't have nice things
033. [Text]
The standard example of existential anguish is said to be standing on the edge of a cliff or other high place; there inevitably comes a moment in most self-aware individuals where they experience the realization that not only do they fear falling to their death, but there's nothing stopping them from throwing themselves off. I've always found it strange that a moment of experiencing true freedom like that would be considered distressing rather than a relief; knowing that there's nothing holding me back - that I am in full control of my own choices, whether it's to stand perfectly still or throw myself off - and there is nothing pre-written into whatever it is that I am that will dictate what I do either way is something I've always found calming.
It begs the question, however - do we choose our fears, and more importantly, do we choose how we respond to them?
If nothing is predetermined and everything about our lives comes down to choice, it makes sense to me that our fears also have to come down to choice, whether consciously or not. The part I'm not entirely sure of is the response.
For example, if one is attacked by some sort of animal, it makes sense that one would fear that animal. However, the response to animal attacks tend to vary - some will try to minimize their contact with that sort of animal as much as they can, while others will immerse themselves in it and attempt to desensitize themselves. Is there a particular thing that predetermines what choice a person is going to make?
I'm curious about your thoughts on it; you don't have to detail what fears you have and how you handle them, though if you would like to that might be helpful. I'm more interested in whether you think this sort of thing comes down to ingrained personality - something more inherent, I suppose - or personal choice, and whether such a thing can be changed.
Answer me anonymously if you wish; as always, your response is of more interest to me than your identity, and quite frankly I'm not in the mood to judge either way.
(As for the existential anguish, I've found over the years that I get the greatest satisfaction from neither the thought of staying put, nor the thought of throwing myself off - I've always enjoyed the notion that if I stand on the edge long enough, perhaps someone will act on their compulsion to put their hands against my back and shove.)
It begs the question, however - do we choose our fears, and more importantly, do we choose how we respond to them?
If nothing is predetermined and everything about our lives comes down to choice, it makes sense to me that our fears also have to come down to choice, whether consciously or not. The part I'm not entirely sure of is the response.
For example, if one is attacked by some sort of animal, it makes sense that one would fear that animal. However, the response to animal attacks tend to vary - some will try to minimize their contact with that sort of animal as much as they can, while others will immerse themselves in it and attempt to desensitize themselves. Is there a particular thing that predetermines what choice a person is going to make?
I'm curious about your thoughts on it; you don't have to detail what fears you have and how you handle them, though if you would like to that might be helpful. I'm more interested in whether you think this sort of thing comes down to ingrained personality - something more inherent, I suppose - or personal choice, and whether such a thing can be changed.
Answer me anonymously if you wish; as always, your response is of more interest to me than your identity, and quite frankly I'm not in the mood to judge either way.
(As for the existential anguish, I've found over the years that I get the greatest satisfaction from neither the thought of staying put, nor the thought of throwing myself off - I've always enjoyed the notion that if I stand on the edge long enough, perhaps someone will act on their compulsion to put their hands against my back and shove.)
[text]
[text]
It's always seemed a bit pointless to me; I rather appreciate not having those experiences, and if it means I remain rational when others can't, then that's their problem, not mine.
[...Sociopathy, Kimblee. That thing you just described. That's sociopathy.]
[text]
Were you human before?
[text]
That's not the first time I've been asked that question, however.
[text]
If you don't feel emotion and you don't believe in righteousness then what satisfies you?
[text]
But when it comes to what gives me satisfaction...I suppose that would be my relationship with the world.
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I'm not offended, mind you. Just curious.
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With all the choices in the world at your feet you'd rather cast it all away? That's what the beaten down do when they know no better. It strikes me as unnatural. And doesn't it cause just the opposite of a world shaped by the strong if people allow others to use them instead of bringing their own power to bear?
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And that's different how?
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Perhaps I'll explain it to you one day.
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also expected the answer to be semantics]
And that sounds not at all suspect.
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[Let him replay those last few comments...]
Can't you explain how those two things are different without telling the entire tale?
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Don't worry, you'll hear it eventually. You're an interesting person, and the sort that I'll tell one day because I suspect you'd understand it.
But not now.
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Thank you. It's a small return on the favor but I don't have anything to hide of my situation if you do ever wish to be told of that.
[WALTER]