explosivecombat | 02X - Reintro. [Text/Locked Audio to the Rocket Frequency]

02X - Reintro. [Text/Locked Audio to the Rocket Frequency]

[TEXT]

[Well! Those of you on the network today will be greeted by a bit of audio late this morning, from a device ID that's been bouncing back all attempts at contact for the last several weeks.]

...Oh, that's cute.

[...well, if that wasn't the most triumphant return ever, I don't know what is.

At the very least, however, he seems to get over whatever he's almost audibly linefacing at long enough to realize that the device is recording something; he promptly switches the thing over to text - he's never really liked talking at the machine when he's addressing all of Johto.]

My, it seems this place does still have its sense of humor, doesn't it? And here I thought that perhaps I'd only lost three days at worst - it was a bit of a surprise to find out otherwise.

Ah, but that's neither here nor there, is it?

[Kimblee, hon.]

There's not much to report from home, unfortunately; however, it'll be a pleasure getting in contact with all of you again - hopefully you've all been at least reasonably well.

[Oh, well. At least he doesn't seem too off-put by the whole disappearing-for-a-month-and-a-half thing?]

[PRIVATE AUDIO - TEAM ROCKET FREQUENCY]

[...At least, not until the audio message that goes out over the private Rocket network a few minutes later; Kimblee's voice is cold and clipped, and the amiable "tone" from the text earlier is completely absent.

He has no idea if he still holds his rank or not; he suspects he doesn't. Like hell if he won't throw it around anyway. He's a bit displeased at his life basically being a .gif from Community, and he's going to figure out what in the good hell is going on if it kills him.]

This is Team Rocket Beta Solf J Kimblee, reporting back in for duty; to my superiors, I admit that I don't know what happened, but I assure you that it won't happen again.

To the rest of you - check in with me immediately, particularly if you're one of my subordinates. I'm receiving a lot of "ID Not Found" nonsense, and I need to know who's still present; given that and various things that I've had to hear about secondhand, I expect a full report regarding what happened here from someone, I'm not feeling particularly choosy right now.

New members to the organization - welcome to it, and you have my personal apologies for the disarray. For now, you're welcome to introduce yourselves; it'll serve you well to know that I'm good to those who are good to me. Again, prove yourself useful and you'll be rewarded.

None of this is a request. Allow me to make that much clear.

[...oh dear. Well. At least he's not in much position to actually do anything at the moment - this is Team Rocket we're talking about, and if somebody's on the network very vocally overstating their importance and/or competence, that means it's pretty much a day ending in Y.]

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[...Lust, you are trying so hard here, it's almost precious. He knows better than to say anything, but...]

Well, that is interesting, isn't it - are you that restless? Mind you, I'm not saying that I'm opposed; such a legion could prove interesting, if done properly.

Though not to complain about your choice of titles, but we might want something a little less obvious, don't you think?

I suppose you're correct. However, I'm not sure if stealth was going to be one of the intentions, given that I'm interested in inviting along the Commander for our purposes. [ He'd just invite himself anyways. ]

However, I am growing quite restless and, ironically enough, it only seems to be the hell raisers that make any type of progress here at Johto that isn't idling about and then screeching when their pokémon reproduces. I suppose we can all propose and vote on names together. [ Or something. ]

We might not want to act out just yet - although now that you mention our dear Commander...

I currently have an active alliance involving him and another individual; I believe I mentioned some time ago that we're working toward some fairly lofty goals. I stand by what I said then - as you've been so good to me in the past, it would hardly be fair to leave you out of the proceedings, now, would it? Especially as I think you would enjoy our little undertaking.

I request nothing but time, so I can see where we all stand with one another and what setbacks have been incurred by my absence; I can assure you, however, that hell will be raised in a way that I believe you'll approve of.

[ If Lust has ever come so close to being pleased by a human in her life, this might be it. This sounds absolutely delicious. It's clogging the arteries to her nonexistent heart like the ingredients Paula Deen cookbook. ] My, my! I'm flattered to be invited to such an event. I have to say, I've been becoming more and more restless ever since I was relieved of my previous duties with Gluttony. [ As much as she hated reminding him not to eat his pokémon, it passed the time. ] I'll be willing to assist in any way I can. I understand the need for time, I'm a very patient person after all. [ DOING DAD'S WORK TIRELESSLY FOR 250 YEARS.... ] Especially when you're returning from being expelled from the land of Johto. If there are is any other way to wish for me to assist, as I run finances, I'd be willing to assist there too. However, I'm quite interested in gathering Johto's finest together. If anything, at least they can provide diversions for your over aching plan.

[ Villains manipulating villains manipulating villains: the thread. ]

you've asked me something similar way back, I think

[... Did he dodge the question yet?]

[Crow.]

...It is something people ask one another from time to time; the answer tends to change a bit.

[He'll take that as a no.]

oh yeah I guess

[Might as well be honest...]

well I don't really know

yet

MAYBE IT HAS TO DO WITH ACCOUNTABILITY.
WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT, AS A SOLDIER, YOU'RE JUST FOLLOWING ORDERS.
THERE'S A CERTAIN ELEMENT THAT'S TO BE EXPECTED.
TAKING LIVES HAPPENS TO BE ONE OF THOSE ELEMENTS.
AGAIN, YOU'RE JUST DOING WHAT YOU'RE FUCKING TOLD LIKE A GOOD LITTLE BARKBEAST.
NOBODY IS GOING TO DO SHIT TO YOU OR LOOK DOWN ON YOU FOR IT.
**BUT**
OUTSIDE OF THAT? IT'S ALL ON YOU.
YOU'RE NOT EXACTLY FOLLOWING ORDERS IF YOU DECIDE SOMEONE YOU KNOW OR SOME RANDOM FUCKASS NEEDS TO BITE THE DUST.
THAT CAN BE PREMEDITATED, WHEREAS WARFARE IS MORE ON THE FLY.
MOST OF THE TIME, YOU'RE NOT THINKING ABOUT THE FIFTY OR SEVENTY DIFFERENT WAYS THAT YOU CAN GUT SOMEONE FOR THE HELL OF IT ON THE BATTLEFIELD.
OFF OF IT? THAT'S VERY PLAUSIBLE.
I'M NOT SAYING THAT I UNDERSTAND HOW IT COULD BE ACCEPTABLE IN ONE INSTANCE AND IN THE OTHER IT'S THIS BIG GODDAMN NO NO
BECAUSE I REALLY DON'T?
I MEAN I CAN SEE WHERE IT MIGHT *STEM* FROM, BUT IT'S STILL PRETTY RETARDED.
...
SO SAYS THE TROLL THAT LIKELY COULDN'T PUT DOWN HIS OWN FRIENDS.

Grah ha ha ha! I don't care about seniority. I'm a King; I command soldiers! And the fact that those so-called higher ups haven't lifted a finger just proves how lousy they are at running the show.

[So maybe this solider guy is a mild step up, but Bowser's a stubborn guy. Why should he follow anyone's orders?]

As for me, I've been whipping up a secret fortress in a location nobody would ever suspect. It's the perfect spot to launch an attack!

[Well, fortunately enough Kimblee isn't going to be issuing too many orders for the time being; he's a bit too busy dealing with the pile of WHAT that's been thrown at him by the individuals who are both apparently incredibly happy to see him and yet insisting on bringing him more bad news every time he talks to them. Goodness, people, he could have used a nicer homecoming gift than this...

But that's neither here nor there; he quirks an eyebrow a bit at the whole "King" thing, however, more than slightly entertained. This one is striking him as being like Cobra, really - amusing until proven legitimately useful.]

Well, I do hope you haven't much interest in commanding me, soldier or not - my commanding officer is already present, and I don't plan on chancing allegiances anytime soon.

Though I'm assuming your ultimate goal here is the ever-inspired "ruling the world"?

[Kimblee misses Gluttony with about the same vigor as one would miss a drillbit boring into one's skull, but he can see where she's coming from. Sort of.]

I'll be interested in seeing the results of this gathering of yours - and you know that I'm still willing to follow whatever...ah, guidance, you're willing to put forth. Assignments and whatnot are always welcome from you.

It's been far too long since I've served this family of yours properly; perhaps we ought to remedy that sometime.

See, that's the spirit! Perhaps one day you'll do that without fishing for a reaction first - especially since I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment. I think the strangest that's been thrown at me is an alternate version of my own world altogether and...whatever's happening with the aliens and the brightly-colored horses; absolutely none of that is strange anymore. And that's without taking into consideration the Pokémon themselves.

As for still being here, it's likely going to be no consolation, but I haven't the vaguest idea what I did to be sent back; I'm sure your acquaintance has said as much as well.

I believe I might have one coming up, of sorts. You see, I've come to the conclusion that waiting in the shadows doesn't work in a place that's so stagnant as route. The shadows just remain where they are, unmoving from the same light source. My intention with this gathering is being able to coordinate on levels we've never seen before. If one person is preparing something in Vermillion, then perhaps one can create a diversion in the next town so when the event hits, it hits big. After all, there's already a system of allies against Team Rocket. What happens if there was a system of allies against allies? [ In other words, Bad hurting good hurting bad. ]

The alternate versions worlds aren't really surprising to me, since the existence of parallel worlds has been known to us for ages. It would be a bit strange to run into an alternate version of myself, certainly, but it's something I know could happen at some point. The aliens and the brightly-coloured horses, however... those were a bit more difficult to get used to. As were Pokemon, of course, but they could easily be more bizarre.

I doubt anything we do has anything to do with it, honestly. It seems more like we're brought here and sent back based on something's whims.

If you did, I would think I horribly misjudged your character.

[There's a slight pause as he considers any other news.]

There is some positive amongst all of the negative. I've been hard at work with my research, and I am nearly at the point of presenting it to you all. I do believe you may like my findings thus far.

I've been informed that some alternate version of myself definitely exists - some of the individuals I know here knew him. Or, well, knew me, if we're going to get incredibly technical, though I've heard that there are enough differences for it to be incredibly clear that we aren't the same person.

[He has not, however, heard about the fact that this alternate version is sporting a mullet and is pretty much the biggest psychotic hick in Amestrian history. Because people like to keep actually relevant information from him.]

At any rate, it's certainly something beyond us that's doing this, though I really wouldn't be surprised if it's technically someone.

Is that so...?

[Seriously, why are the fabulous ones always the ones that are ridiculously lab-competent? Between this one and Kato...

Well, as long as Dist doesn't insist on parading about in dresses, everything will be fine, surely.]

And what has this research of yours entailed, exactly? Or is it a surprise for later?

[It's a direct correlation. The more fabulous, the more awesome with science. But no, there will be no dresses or fake boobs involved.]

I believe I've given you a few details in the past, but here is a recap:

I've been working with Pokemon that evolve via items and trading in attempt to determine just what parts of their genetic makeup trigger the process. However, doing so has been slightly difficult without proper equipment, and well...I believe I am just about finished creating said equipment. If I am able to successfully record the information I need, I may just be able to do some genetic manipulation of my own.

Yeap.

[What he won't say? Childish, foolish, crazy and just...they just can't be taken seriously. I mean, his first brush with Rocket leadership was Cobra Commander . Laughing maniacally does not score you any points on the bad-o-meter, in Rude's view.]

They're Insert long long pause here as Rude tries to figure out something to say about them that wouldn't have him kicked out of Team Rocket unpredictable.

Forgive me if it's seen as poor form to speak less than favorably of one's coworkers, but that's possibly the most diplomatic way you could have worded that. I'm well aware of what we're working with, don't worry.

I do hope none of them gave you too much trouble.

So I see... well, depending on how different the universe is to begin with, it's understandable how your counterpart could be a completely different person. It would still be somewhat unsettling to deal with, though.

That's been my theory for quite some time, honestly, though I'm not quite sure if the root cause of this is the result of human action.

And what are you proposing, if not human action?

You better believe it! What kind of self-respecting baddy doesn't wanna rule it all? Especially in a place like this, packed with powerful flunkies. It's perfect!

Plus, somebody's gotta change the sappy friendship garbage everybody spews on a daily basis.

[Seriously, it's too peaceful. Peaceful and lame.]

Oh, I can't say I disagree with that - people really do get insipid over that entire love-and-friendship business. When it comes to the Pokémon, it makes me wonder whether they'd befriend their guns were they given any, given that that's effectively what they're doing by keeping these things as pets. As for forming bonds with other humans...well. Those will only get them so far in the end, and they'll more than likely regret it in one way or another. There are very few relationships that don't end in pain like that, I find. Not that I would know.

[The words are cold, however, as opposed to fishing; not attempting to hint at inner pain or passive-aggressively seek validation, simply stating fact.]

On the other hand, ruling the world has never really interested me personally. I can't say I'd know what to do with it, once I had it.

[...goodness lord.]

Well! I can't say I disapprove of your message any - you really have been considering this for a while.

Count me in, though that likely goes without saying. Do make it fun for me?

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02X - Reintro. [Text/Locked Audio to the Rocket Frequency]

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